Looking into my suitcase while attempting to pack is like peering over the edge of the Grand Canyon. I hold my hands to my ears, like that tortured soul in the Edvard Munch painting, and hear the hurricane roar of trying not to scream.

Packing the Hard Way

“Use your words,” my wife suggests, gently, from the hallway, where she has sought shelter. But there are no words. Only socks. And underwear.

And the unshakable vertigo of falling infinitely into the gaping jaws of The Thing That Will Never Hold Enough. You know those opening credits of Mad Men, when Don Draper spirals helplessly past lurid skyscraper walls? He’s actually falling into my suitcase.

Every time you pack, you reveal something about yourself. Claw into the contents of your suitcase as if you’re doing an archaeological dig and you’ll find sharp bits of personality; little secrets that are buried among the T-shirts, socks and shaving gear.

The Mercury 7 U.S. astronauts had the right stuff, a quality that’s primal. They took a macho approach to the space program. They didn’t haul any emotional baggage up there, they just got ’er done. And they probably knew how to pack light, because when you hit zero gravity, if your carry-on springs open, you don’t want all your gear floating around, especially if it’s, you know, stuff that would embarrass you.

What Do You Need to Pack?

What do you really need when you travel? If you size everything down to a single, I-can’t-do-without-this thing, what do you hold? Is it your passport? Is it your money? Is it your rosary beads? Is it your watch? Or… is it your teddy bear?

Yeah, you heard me. Teddy bear.

The soft and cuddly, clutch-to-your-chest talisman with the umbilical cord that links you back to that one day in your childhood when you were going on your first overnight and you wanted to take something that was meaningful enough to evoke warm feelings of safety and belonging. Something you could grasp with your chubby fingers that was a fuzzy memento of home.

Even Pilots Pack Their Teddy Bears

Think that’s weird? A Travelodge survey of 6,000 business travellers considered the stuff they pack. Twenty-five per cent of the guys who responded said they pack their teddy bears. And one guy who saw the survey results disclosed he has taken his teddy bear with him to Mexico, Vancouver, St. John’s, Montreal, Ottawa, San Francisco and New York.

Does he get his own seat, this bear? Or is he shut into the suitcase like some vampire, awakening when needed at twilight, his button eyes popping open the moment his master treads toward a springy bed in some luxury hotel, hugging him to his chest?

An airline pilot even said he brings his teddy bear along on trips and—perhaps this is a comfort to those bear-bearing passengers among us—it is smartly dressed in a pilot’s uniform. Which was fine, until I dozed off during a flight and dreamed I saw the little sucker buckled into the co-pilot’s seat.

Pilot One to Co-pilot Teddy: “Hey, you want to announce the weather? Remember, e-nun-ci-ate.”

What Do You Need to Pack in Your Bag?

So what’s the most revealing thing you’ve ever packed in your suitcase, the thing that gives you the most comfort? Head to the up! Facebook Page and share your must-have item and if it’s a teddy bear, don’t be ashamed.

I explained to the nice customs lady why he was dressed in a Calgary Flames jersey and how important is it for guys who travel these crazy days to have the right stuff. Or, at least, to have a pal you can count on who has the right stuffing.